It’s been a Year

….And this is the next instalment of why my pony is still the bestest pony ever...

- Hanging with his best buddy -

The last time I posted on this blog, we had gone on an amazing trail ride, and had the best fun. So what did we get up to the rest of the year of 2017?

Well, I packed up the family and we moved overseas to Thailand.

Yeah, you did read that correctly!

We left on the 24th of April 2017, and I was going to write more about it while we were over there, but I got pretty sick due to not being able to access my treatments for my hypothyroidism - oh hey, I haven't written about that either! - so it never really happened.

The short story is: I didn't want to sell Copper. I've tried to do that before, when I had both Joey and Copper. (remember Joey? He broke my elbow in four places... But he was smart and cute when he wasn't being a brat)

Back then I had had a lot of interest in Copper, and on paper he sounds like an ammy rider's dream. The problem is, he is in every way except under saddle.

He's got impeccable ground manners, he is an excellent doer, he's got rock solid feet, he travels like a dream, and he's quiet and reliable. He is brilliant no matter how long you throw him out in the paddock for, he will come back to you and try whatever you ask of him. He doesn't break himself very often, and rarely needs a vet.

But he's not an easy ride. He is gentle, and can't buck, won't rear. But he is sensitive. He will take off on you if you ride hanging on to his mouth.

 

It's funny how many people get on him and can't ride him for nuts. And yes, there was this one time that a lady tried him out and he came so close to bolting on her. She was literally balancing herself on his mouth right from the beginning. He hadn’t even gone two steps before he started to panic. I had to teach her how to do an emergency one rein stop right then and there.

The downside is he is also nowhere near educated enough for an experienced rider to take him on. He'd need a super special home and to be honest, I really just couldn't bear the thought of him going somewhere that wouldn't love him for what he is - an honest horse, who is willing to show up do whatever you ask (within reason of course!).

So that left me with a huge dilemma! What to do with Copper while we spend two years or so in South East Asia?

Thankfully after a lot of agonizing, I found an amazing agistment/spelling place that would take him under unusual circumstances, i.e. - his owner is going away overseas and won't be able to check up on him at all!

So we moved him out Yass way. It's an hour out of Canberra, in the middle of nowhere, but it's cheap, and he has taken to the change like a total champ!

I finally got to go out and see him on the weekend, and I was sooooo happy when I saw how good he was looking.

- Just look at those muscles tho!! He looks so, so good! -

He has been a bit weak and untoned since his bout of stringhalt in 2016 - he lost so much muscle on his hind quarters, particularly around his gaskins. They literally withered away with muscle atrophy.

But I swear he looks better than he ever has - except for the time I was riding him regularly and we had a great lesson program, his topline was perfect then... But anyway, right now, despite not being touched for a year, he looks so good.

He doesn't have that lovely topline, but he doesn't look like a pregnant land whale, so I am incredibly chuffed to see how well he has done.

And of course, I had to ride him!

I started first with a little bit of groundwork to see what he remembered (all of it – clever boy!) and to gauge what kind of mood he was in - willing to try!

So I hopped on bareback and toodled around the arena. He felt strong and well shaped underneath me, but stiff. Oh, so very stiff! We had to remember that yes sideways *IS* possible and you can move one foot over at a time. Hah!

- Best Pony. Happy Face. -

That's to be expected, and even though he wasn't anywhere as responsive as he normally is, I couldn't stop grinning. Man, I love that horse.

We even did a bit of trotting on a 20m circle, and finished the ride off after about twenty or so minutes. Not a long ride, but so satisfactory.

I can't tell you how good it's been to be home, but it’s been made even better seeing Copper again.

If it was any other horse I wouldn’t be able to do this with him. I just wouldn’t. There’d be no point as the horse would either break themselves in the paddock, or need extra feed, or go mental being left to run wild for that long. But it’s Copper. There’s no way around it, he’s special.

He takes it all in his stride and is still a brilliant horse!

- The difficulties of taking selfies with your horse’s giant mug. Still smiling though!! -

I hope to visit him at least once more before we fly back to Thailand. It's a long way out to see him, but it's so worth it.

I also have to make sure his teeth and feet checked over before I leave so that gives me a good reason to get out there, and you better believe I can't wait to ride him again.

- It surprised me to see Copper bossing about the ponies! He is usually the lowest man in the herd, so this was interesting to me. Guess he figured out that he’s bigger then they are! -

See ya,

Bonita

Facing Reality

It has been one of those years.

I know that it’s been ages since the last update and for good reason.

I have been so overwhelmed by all the drama going on that I just could not cope with riding, or anything more than feeding and grooming him. And sometimes, even that was a difficult stretch…. Yeah. It was that bad…

I really can’t go into the details, also, I really don’t want to revisit it. But in my last post (aptly titled Barn Drama), I was relating the problems we’d had at the beginning of this year with our new paddock arrangements. I thought we had gotten through it, and I had been feeling cautiously optimistic that we may have found a workable solution.

Turns out, not so much.

The subsequent incident that exploded on us in July was far worse than the one at the beginning of the year, and left me with very few options to work with. Suffice to say, we did manage to find a spot for Copper at the paddocks, but the consequences of the whole event affected him and I for months after. I didn’t ride for months, and even now, it’s not a sure thing that I will ride just once a week.

The fallout is still affecting us daily.

I don’t know if next year I will still be able to keep my horse. That’s how bad it is… It breaks my heart to even think of selling him, but I can’t see how we will get around it when winter comes.

So for now, I’m not thinking that far ahead.

I just can’t.

I can’t keep thinking about the whys, the hows, and the what-do-I-dos of keeping my horse. I’m just taking it one day at a time.

Every chance I get to ride is the best day ever, and I’m not thinking any further than that.

See ya,

Bonita

Moving Shenanigans & Settling In

Shenanigans > (greater than) Settling into new paddocks. That about says it all doesn’t it?
Sunday morning, out in the paddock…

- “Rawh! My treatz!” says Copper to Robbie, his best bud -

- “Oh-tay, we iz fwends agin… Wut you mean – Buh Beye? I dunna get it…” -

- “Oh, dis wut you mean… One of dese homen-beanz horse gobbling fingz.” -

- “Srsly – agin with de clicky fing? No… Won’t smile… Wanna eat.” -

- “Weh you goin’? …Mom! …Mom!! DON”T LEAVE ME!!! I DON’T NOE ANYONEZ HERH!!” -

- “Told ya not to go…. *insert smirk*” -

- “I didn’t noes fencez bit! Honest!” -

- “Hai… I iz glad you here…” -

- *omnomnomnom* -

So long story - everything was going really smoothly with our move...  Turns out, it didn’t quite stay that way!!  :O

We started by picking up the hire float, then fetching Copper in from the paddock.

I prepped him for travel with float boots and plaiting up his tail. Copper walked up the ramp, stopped – had a sniff and a look, then marched right on.

I was so relieved… I didn’t expect any trouble, I know he’s been well trained with floats being an ex-racer off the track, but counting it up – Copper hasn’t been out on a float in over four years!  So I was kind of wondering if he’d be easy or a bit tricky.

We got over to our new home in 45 minutes or so – and he travelled really well, no clopping or clattering around – just eating from his hay net.  I should take him out more often…  :P

He unloaded fine, we walked around and explored; said hello to new pony faces over the fences, and then walked every inch of his new boundary fences.  *phew!* That took a while – and less than half way through he was all: “Can we stahp? Bored now… I want munchies!”

Copper was looking fairly settled - still a bit stressed and anxious, but he wasn't pacing or anything. He was eating, drinking, pooping and peeing - very normal horse behaviour, so I went home to fetch a hose and come back to fill up his trough.


In the hour or so that I was gone the dingbat ran through a border fence between paddocks and ended up in the neighbour's paddock!!



He was okay, but had to be rescued by the neighbour. He ended up with some abrasions on the front of his hind cannons - right on the front/under his hocks.

There was also a minor cut that was a bit deep, it had a skin flap that I gently pulled back and flushed with a ton of betadine!

I bandaged the cut, I was hoping that would hold the skin flap on so it would reattach, but the bandage slipped down in the night and the skin flap was half attached, and half dried up when I came back out the next morning.  

I fully expected to see swelling and lameness, but he was actually pretty good. So I guess it’s all’s well that ends well – for that kind of incident it could have been a lot worse.

If it teaches him to respect the fence though, I guess that's good, because seriously horse!



Such a silly boy...

But he is all "Don't leave me!!" when I go down, so I do feel sorry for him.



He's uncharacteristically clingy...

He is fretting a bit, and won't go into the actual paddock to eat. He's just staying the lane way down the front which isn’t very large, and doesn’t have much grass at all.

I mean, it's not like he couldn't stand to lose a few (Let’s be real here - a lot!) kilos, but I don't want him to colic.

I have been visiting him twice a day – once in the morning, and once in the evening for the last three days; Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.

On Wednesday morning, this happened:

Yep, first ride in new place… 

There’s not much to say about it, except he was a lot more rideable than what I’d been expecting!

With a little lunge (when he was trotting he exhaled the giant breath he’d been holding… Lol) and some lateral work at a walk, he was listening and felt quite relaxed when I hopped off 20 minutes later!

I was stoked – I feel like the work we’ve be doing towards learning how to relax even in tense moments has really been sinking in! He had all his marbles, but he was nice and forward – I was thinking that this would be a great competition frame of mind. ;)

It’s all groovy baby. 

See ya,
bonita

Wave Goodbye; We Are Off To A New Paddock

It is exciting and sort of scary, but definitely exciting – Copper and I are moving to a new equestrian complex this weekend.

We’ve been agisting at the same paddocks for over a decade, and it’s been great. The people and horses at our paddocks are fabulous – we all get along and have never really had any of that barn drama.

I’m going to miss them all.

Copper’s been running with his herd for years, and I know he’s going to miss his friends too.

I’m also going to miss the familiar, beautiful stretches of golden fields. But I have got to say – I’m so excited to move too.

And the whole reason we are moving?

We’re upgrading to a private, two horse paddock with all the facilities you could want for riding!

I’ve been waiting for this for years, and I’m so thrilled!

Still, saying goodbye to all this… 

   

It’s going to be sad.

In many ways…

… It’s the end of an era.

  

See ya,

bonita

Paddock Drama, Rug Monsters & Bareback Rides

I’ve been so busy running around and actually riding that I haven’t had a chance to write up any blog posts. Of course, that also means I have another TLDR right here for you…

- I iz handsom -

So the story starts when we had a run in with some animal activists. I will try to keep it short, but the government has a kangaroo cull running in the hills behind our paddocks. It’s necessary, but some people don’t really agree. So in order to try and ‘discourage’ the culling, someone/s decided to open the gates and let our herd of thirteen horses loose.

Yes, you heard right.  They decided that letting the horses out into the paddocks was the best way to stop people from shooting.

Never mind the fact that even if the horses had decided that the safest thing to do was to run towards to the loud scary noises in the dark, (ha!) I sincerely doubt it would actually stop the work of the culling.

To add to that, the gates towards the road where open. So really all they had to do was go down the wrong way and they’d be out on the roads. At night. No street lights. In a 80 kilometre (50 miles) an hour zone.

Yup.

Want to know what happens when you hit an 800 kilo animal at 80 kms an hour? Yeah... People die. So do horses.  And I thought you were animal activists because you cared about animals.

There are no words.

But the results are that thankfully the whole herd came back, though they were panicked, scared, and more than a little freaked out.

Copper was sore, and strained in his hindquarters/loin area. He has been ever since, though he’s slowly getting better.

 - I eatz rug monstaz! Rwah! -

Then last Monday, we had a run in with the horrid rug monster of doomed!

It wasn’t good. One of the horses, a Thoroughbred called M, has string halt, and he’s gotten tangled up in one of his rugs before, but unfortunately the same thing happened again.

He flipped out. He was bucking and kicking, and basically running along on his front legs, with his back legs in the air because he couldn’t move them fast enough to keep up with the front end.

All of this started just as I was walking Copper down the lane right next to the paddock. Of course, he just about lost it himself. He stood staring and snorting, and almost kept it together, but that other horse just wouldn’t stand still, so Copper freaked too.  He spun sideways, and it would have been fine except my saddle slipped big time.

I ended up hanging on his right side as the saddle had come completely off his back and all I could think was “GET OFF NOW!”. I kicked my foot out of the left stirrup easily enough, but for one heart stopping moment I doubted that I’d get my right foot free at all. All my weight was pressing into the stirrup, making it hard to kick off.

Somehow I did get it free and I immediately pushed off Copper’s side to the ground. He didn’t realise what I was doing so he tried to take off, but I had a firm grip on the reins, so he spun around me instead.

I walked him back up the laneway as fast as I could; I had to get his gear off and help that horse who was still loosing it the paddock.

I lead Copper to the mounting log (yes, literally a fallen log we use to mount from) and started to strip off his tack. Unfortunately, I automatically started with the girth, but realized my mistake when the saddle was hanging by the breastplate alone!

I was supporting the saddle with my torso by pushing it against Copper’s side, wrestling with stiff, weighted breastplate straps and praying that he didn’t move or the whole thing would be swinging free around his front legs and then we REALLY would have had a disaster on our hands!

Thankfully, Copper seems to be mostly sensible in a “I’m too freaked to move” kind of way when he gets scared so I managed to get all the buckles undone to free the saddle and put it on the log, along with the breastplate.

- I haz treat foh bein’ good rightz? - 

Then I led him to the arena area, which is fenced, stripped off his bridle, and shut the gate, only to find that the gate wouldn’t shut! I hastily jerry-rigged some bailing twine around the gate and clipped the chain to that in hopes that Copper would still be sensible and not test the gate’s security.

Then I ran and grabbed my halter and hot-footed it to the paddock.

By this stage M had worn himself to pieces, and was too injured and tired to move. So I crept up to him murmuring soothing noises, and offered him some liquorice I luckily had in my back pocket.

He automatically took the liquorice, though I think he hardly knew what he was doing. Then I slipped the halter on, and hastily got to work on the rug.

The neck elastic was still done up, but down around his chest, and the chest buckles where down at his knees, so I was glad I still had my helmet on!

The rest of the rug was in tatters, and tangled around his back legs. I was able to slip it down his body and coax him to step out of the wreckage.  He couldn’t walk anywhere though, so I called around, and thankfully his owner turned up pretty quickly.

- Stap playin’ wit that silly fing Mom an’ take I out to mah fwendz! -

In the meantime, Copper was cantering up and down the arena fence instead of grazing like I’d hoped he would, so I went back to rescue him! He was too wound up to tack up (again) and ride, so I fed him instead.

Plus, that’s the second time my saddle has slipped badly and this time was the worst. It was an extremely dangerous situation to be in.

His saddle cannot slip like that during freak out moments – that’s how we both end up hurt, or worse.

So that brings me to the next part: bareback rides.

I’ll be riding him bareback until I can get a saddle fitter out to assess the problem.

I’ve already had one ride and it was actually pretty fun! You really can feel everything that’s going on in his entire frame, which makes it easier to figure out what’s going wrong as well as how to use your body to fix it.

I think I’ll be adding bareback rides to our regular ride schedule even when I do get my saddle fixed. It’s really cool! 

See ya,

bonita

Coming Back to Horse Riding after a C-Section Delivery

- Waiting at the gate. Copper’s happy to see me! -

It’s been a while hasn’t it?

I have been to see Copper twice since Charlotte was born, but as I haven’t been cleared to exercise yet I haven’t been riding.

To be honest, I haven’t really been up for it anyway.  Charlotte was born by caesarean section due to some complications, and while she has been happy, healthy, and growing like a weed, I haven’t been recovering so quickly.

It’s been four weeks and one day since she was born, and I’ve spent the vast majority of that time in bed. And I’ve needed to, otherwise I get really sore through out my core and back, and across my wound. And (TMI alert!!) I make my bleeding start up again and usually it’s quite heavy when that happens.

My body is really shattered, and it’s going to take me quite a long time to recover.  Probably a least a year before I’m back to full strength.

In the mean time I am doing all I can to aid the healing process.  I’m taking Arnica tablets three times a day, rubbing my belly and scar with Arnica cream every day.  I wear a support bandage 24/7 to help my posture, and I’m taking my supplements as often as I can.  Which should be every day but let’s face it – I’m nursing around the clock and I can’t remember what day it is, let alone what my daily routine should be!

As far as physical recovery goes, I have an exercise routine mapped out to help my core knit back together with my pelvic muscles. I’ve started with Osteopath treatments to wake up the severed nerves and muscle and make my body realise it can knit those together again – not just healing them separately.

Then I plan to do Feldenkrais – which is a method of training yourself through repetitive movement patterns to be aware of the way that your body moves and holds itself so that you can retrain bad habits and create better function.

After I’ve started with the Feldenkrais, I want to pick up some Pilates to start working on regain my fitness, then after a few months if I’m feeling strong enough and up to it I would like to take up Kettlebells or Ballet!  I haven’t decided which yet – and I might end up doing both.

It certainly will be fun to pursue these new forms of exercise, but it’s all because I want to be fitter and stronger so I can ride better.  That’s what it’s ultimately about for me.  

- Happy pony! -

Dressage.

Riding my horse to the best of my ability. Improving my health so I can get the most out of each ride. That’s the end goal, and I’m excited to see how my cross training improves my horse riding.  I think it will be beneficial to my flexibility and range of movement which I hope improves my dressage seat. 

I will have more updates once I get started with my exercise routine and hop back on Copper.  I think it’s a good idea to keep a record of this journey as it’s a fairly big one in terms of where my body is now and how much it has to heal, and of course, how that’s affecting my riding in the mean time. 

Just so you know, Copper is as happy a clam chilling out in his paddock with his herd.  I’m the one who’s missing the riding!

See ya,

bonita

Welcome To The Newest Member Of The Herd

i ♡  i

We are delighted to announce the birth of our baby girl:

 
Head: 35cm
Length: 53cm
Weight: 4.175 kg or 9lb 3oz!

“Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you,
and therefore He exalts Himself to show mercy to you.
For the Lord is a God of justice;
blessed are all those who wait for Him.”
~ Isaiah 30:18 ~

i ♡  i

See ya,

bonita

*surrender*

Yup.  This is about the sum of it.

See ya,

bonita

This Week…

I sat around melting in the heat, getting bigger and bigger. Copper stood around enjoying his holiday, getting fatter and fatter…   : P

Yup.  Life. 

See ya,

bonita

Holiday Cheer!

Happy holidays everyone!  I hope they are as fun for you as it would be going for sleigh ride like this. Imagine gliding over soft powdery snow to the sound of sweet tinkling silver bells and the happy snorts of a spirited team of steeds such as these…

Can’t you just about hear the fellow on the right saying to his team mate: “Rightyho old chap, on the count of three – let’s show them what speed really means!”

See ya,

bonita

Seasonal Greetings!

 

Have a wonderful Christmas and a lovely New Years - we are celebrating with our family, than going away for a trip to see the great grandparents (my grandparents) and a few days at the beach.  Copper will get another holiday that he doesn’t need, but oh well.  It will be fun - I’m looking forwards to it.  I’ll see you in 2014!

See ya,

bonita

No big surprise.

 

And we’re back to this again.  I’m going to sell Joey.  For real this time. 

Previously when I have talked about making this move, my reasons have revolved around doubts of my ability to train him and work out our issues.  This time however, my reason for selling is a little more than that – I now have no doubts that, in time, I could train him.  Sure, I might need advice from professionals every once in a while – I might even have to pay for that advice (sending him to a trainer or something) – but I could do it.

The million dollar question is: how long is that going to take?

I guess it’s really hit home to me that Joey is a lot further away from being the horse I want than what I originally thought he was.  He’s been semi-reliable in the arena, but any thing more than that; and I do mean anything – add another horse for example – and I just don’t know what I am going to get from him.

I just don’t have time to work all of that out with him.  And frankly, at this point in my life, I don’t want to either.  I do really enjoy the challenges of training horses, and it’s been a fantastic learning experience training my first young horse.

But when I get to ride one, two – maybe three times a week if I’m lucky, you can bet your shorts that I want every ride to be a good one (within reason of course!).  I don’t want to have to wonder what I’m going to get, I just want to get on. and. ride.  

No drama, no fuss, no hassle.

And that’s definitely not Joey’s descriptor at the moment!  So our journey together comes to an end, and I’m looking forwards to my elbow healing so that I can move onto the next chapter. 

See ya,

bonita

Baby News

She finally made it!  ♥

Isabelle Patricia Joy was born Thursday last week after a loooonnggggg 4 and a half days of prodromal labor.  So far I am tired, sleepy, tired and oh, so hungry{!}, but very, very happy.

Our little family is taking a while to adjust to the new baby, but Theodore is a super big brother.  I love how sweet he is whilst interacting with her ~ cuddling her, inspecting her hands and feet, patting her head if she's crying; they are so adorable together!

(✿◠‿◠) ~ ♥

In the mean time, I am positively itching to ride again, but well, it's going to be a bit of time before that happens....  Still, I'll be up on Joey's back as soon a physically possible!  Can't wait!!

See ya,

bonita

Update on Copper & Life

~ * Hello Copper!  * ~

The great news is that my sister and dad decided to buy Copper and share him!  He’s happy, she’s happy, Dad’s happy – and I am soooo happy!!

That worked out better than I ever hoped it could….  Yay!  :) 

Other news?

~ * Not one of these babies, though he IS cute!  * ~

We’re still waiting for baby to make an appearance.  These last few weeks have been quite tough – I’ve been too tired to do much of anything other than look after the little man, so housework, horses and everything else has pretty much come to a grinding halt.

That’s ok though, I’ve got someone keeping an eye on Joey, and I hope that once baby comes I’ll be back into it in a few weeks.  It’s just about waiting at the moment.

See ya,

bonita

And then there were two...

This is just a quick note to say - I've got Copper back!

Nope, it was not planned, and yes, it really is inconvenient at this point in time.  *sigh* I still have to sell Joey, but can't at the moment as he came up lame in the paddock the other week as is taking a while to heal. Now I have two horses to deal with and I'm not sure what to do!

I do plan to ride Copper as long as I can, but after that I guess I'll have to see.  I was going to sell him to the person that was leasing him - I thought that they were a good match, but that's not happening now, so I have to decide whether to sell or keep Copper.

Part of this decision making involves certain things that have happened at the riding school which I am not very pleased about - I won't go into details, but I do feel like they've been a bit rude and just kind of manhandled me a bit.  Sort of in a "Do as I say and don't cause any trouble or else... And by the way, we are awesome for doing this, so you'd better be grateful!"

Um...  Hello?  I'm supposed to be training as an instructor - that doesn't make me a 14 year old junior that is so happy to have anything to do with horses that they'd put up with any kind of treatment to do what they love.  I'm an adult, and I'd really prefer it if you'd treat me that way.  I work hard for you, and one day I'll be an valuable employee...  But only if you LET me get that far.  Pfft.  Not happy Jan.

'Neways, that was a bit of a sidetrack, but it is related.  I'm not going to be getting as much riding there as I thought I was, so now I am even more stuck as what to do with Copper.  Unlike Joey, does not do well with a patchy riding schedule, Copper is quite level headed and easy going, plus he doesn't break easily {for a horse!} and he is a good doer.  Standies are great like that.  Which means if I was going to keep a horse during this rather hectic and crazy time of life, Copper would probably be it.

Yeah.  This isn't going to be an easy decision.  Especially as the Hubby has gotten rather used to the idea of having the extra money and time available that is currently getting sucked up by the ponies and is quite fond of being a-for-the-time-being horse-free family.  He'd support me either way, but I know he's keen for me to sell them both.

Stuck again.  Ohwell, I guess I'll just cross that bridge when I come to it I suppose.  In the meantime, I can enjoy my pony again!  Yay!

See ya,
bonita

Hard Decisions

 

Some riders are very lucky to never have to face this, but all to often it’s a place I end up coming to – to sell or not to sell.  I’m not sure if it’s because we tend to have a history of passing horses on in our family.  When you have five to three people sharing the same horse, it’s really hard to find one that suits everyone, so after three or four years with us, we’d sell them on, usually far better educated then when we brought them, and for a much higher price! 

Sort of like a long-term dealer I suppose…  Anyway, back to my present situation.  I’ve decided to sell Joey. 

I’ve actually been putting off this decision for at least a month now – not willing to admit that for the moment, my life circumstances will simply not allow him to fit in.  There are also some financial logistics that are rearing their ugly head, but it’s mainly life. 

We are expecting our second baby around the end of March next year.  That means I am currently three and 3/4 months pregnant, and that I haven’t ridden Joey at all for at least three months.  And I don’t see how I will be able to work him consistently any time soon.

I was considering finding another rider to help train him – not a lease, but kind of a co-ownership.   Though honestly, at this stage though I can’t really see that happening.  I’ve inquired around, but there aren’t really any experienced riders that are interested in training up a green 4 and a half year old that don’t already have their hands full with their own mounts.

I also considered just giving him a year off, but this is where the finances came into play.  We can afford to keep him, but it’s not really worth it when he’s just eating the money.  And, again, I’m not even sure how long it would take for me to get back into riding with a just under two year old and a new baby.  Then, once I can ride the logistics (there’s that word again..) of what to do with said babies while riding is some other headache altogether!

I have been supremely blessed as my husband has been working from home the last two years and that meant that basically I could go for a ride whenever I wanted, as long as it didn’t interfere with his work too much. I’d just leave the baby with him, and swan home when I was finished.  He is talking about a new job however, so that means that in the foreseeable future, I’d have to manage the children – find a babysitter or something, or find a way to ride in the am before hubs is off to work.  Neither options really seem like a go at the moment. 

Particularly when you consider that I’ve had about roughly one and half years riding before falling pregnant with baby number two (not including months off for mastitis and any other numerous aliments that have come my way), and there’s every likely possibility that that might be happening again any number of times within the next however many years!

*sigh* 

All of which, compounded by the stress and guilt I feel over not having enough energy to go and look after him, let alone exercise him (thank you all-day-long morning sickness!) has finally brought me around to the realization that Joey is just not the right horse for me at the moment, and I am not the right owner for him.  Let’s not even go into the “feeling like I am giving up/failing him” department and leave it at that.

What has to be, has to be.  While I feel some release over the resolution to a problem that has been bothering me for months now, I also feel a great deal of sadness.  I really like Joey, he has taught me a lot and I really wish I could have had a better chance to bring out the potential in him.  I also feel a bit… Relieved somehow.  I have sort of had a niggling doubt as to whether he was the horse for me all along.  Maybe I sort of knew we would never fit together.  He needs time I just don’t have. 

I know I could keep Joey, but ultimately, that’s not the best thing for him.  I can ride him, I can train him.  He’s come along quite well in the few months I have been able to work him.  He’s calmed down, he’s learnt to trust me and we’ve been building on that.  He’s taught me a lot about training young horses, and stretched me a lot as a rider.  Unfortunately life circumstances – his and mine! – mean that we have to part ways now. 

I’m okay with that.  

“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.”   ― Ernest Hemingway ”     

See ya,

bonita